3november2009

i am not happy...i dont know y
i just dont like it i argued with my fren...
urgghh!!!i just felt like WTF i am telling u something trying to make a point n that*** IS NT GONNA FREAKING commit suicide
n u just argue back very gud ! urggh ! our friendship is officially ruin by one stupid useless topic!
n i can't believe i brought that topic up n ended up in fights n argue
i just felt like crying i dont understand y ....
its so hard to not cry...
i tried not to but i just cant help it...
y ... i felt like u changed a lot n i think thr is a gap n i dont know u too well...
in this conversation i think our friendship is ruin u yell at me ur mad
n i wanted to tell u i dont give a damn! but i cant
i just dont know y this is so damn useless i just hope HL n joie was here then maybe i would stop caring abt what he say...
i just cant take it anymore n i decided hell yeah not talking anymore
even if i talk bak he would shout at me n say which part of i dont wanna talk bout this topic u dont understand...i was just trying to give my point of view....urggh damn i dont wanna talk to u again!go away leave me alone!

MyHotComments


MyHotComments

___________

Halloween party on 30October2009 a memorable day indeed =)

30 october 2009 (friday night its time to party) Halloween eve(this might look so damn weird because no one ever celebrate halloween on the EVE but oh well my life is full of weirdness)

it was raining on the afternoon n that was the last thing i hope god would give me!!!!
i tot it was gonna rain like the other days non-stop!but thank god it stopped
we prepared everything the decoration well it sucked obviously!!!!everything started to fall off it was so horrible
n me n vic went to the lrt station like 2times or more to pick up some of my frens it started so damn boring!!!!
everyone was shy!!
silence for a while n everyone started to go missing especially my frens @___@(vomit blood)
n the most stupid thing is that i switch on the I-pod n the speaker n i forget to press play it was so stupid whn i finally notice it!!!urgghhh humiliation
after food n everything we someone started a water balloon fight n it was awesome!!!everyone was running around the speakers were all soaked in water the i-pod phones all SCREWED!!!!everyone was wet like i dont know sponges or something!!!haha
everyone was running around n whn i wanted to walk up the stairs SPLUSH!!!!a bucket of water from upstairs was poured down!n i think 1 of the buckets even broke cause someone throw it down!
i mean not everyone but some of us drank a few sips of alcohol n man it was horrible yuck!unless they put more lime juice it taste better a lil other than that it was bitter yucky n totally not cool!!!
well maybe i was a bad planner nothing really went correct accept for the water fight other than that was totally not in the plan!!!URGGHH!!! i hope he was thr=( too bad...
if he was thr maybe it might be more fun i guess haha
i bet my blog really sucked dont it haha but i hope u have fun reading it!!!
_________________
Wha- wha- what did she say?
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmm that you only meant well?
Well of course you did.
Mmmm whatcha say,
Mmmm that it's all for the best?
Of course it is.

I was so wrong for so long
Only tryna please myself (myself)
Girl, I was caught up in her lust
When I don't really want no one else
So, no I know I should've treated you better
But me and you were meant to last forever

28August 2009-pavilion trip

it was a sunny day as usual!! :)

that day it started wiv a quite silence start but ended wiv a bunch of unfinished topics!

i had so much fun although we were getting a bit bored n out of idea how we should burn our time...

after the movie we though of going to sing k but others dont agree so we follow the crowd...i still feel so sorry >0<>0<

then we tot of fish spa but then it was totally expensive n it looks a lil gross to me...ewww...small fishes biting ur legs...ewww grosss.....And i even meet a few diff ppls!!!kim , reek n johnathan! they r like so cool omg korea mix thai n thai ?i guess lols!!!!its so awesome i wonder if they know thai language ;P

then me n joie went to window shop a lil while the others get a lovely present for jing wen the present was really cute :P

it was really a great day but its so tiring! from pav walk to hang tuah station it was really a long scary walk...i never wanna walk wiv kx to the station at night scary lar!!!!

i hope sean is thr...but he wasn't but its ok cause he call me that night :D n i am glad he did n i get to listen to his voice!

_______________

Making my way downtown
Walking fast
Faces passed
And I'm home bound

Staring blankly ahead
Just making my way
Making my way
Through the crowd

And I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder....

If I could fall
Into the sky
Do you think time
Would pass me by
'Cause you know I'd walk
A thousand miles
If I could
Just see you
Tonight

i dont get it

today it started off wiv a not so gud mood...all the noice!!!!
sighs...i am so confussed...is it over...
after all this time i have been living in my dreams...all crushed down
because i finally got the answer after so many months i finally got a definition to all this misery...
he loves her...but she dont love him
same as i love him but he dont love me...
is just so hard to understand...
my heart just stop beating that fast when i see him
am i treating him like my brother or what? i dont know
whenever i am with him i feel so happy...never laughed or smile that happily after hl n jy left...
never felt that alive n that not lonely ...
but i still couldn't get my hands off his profile...i just have to keep clicking it keep viewing it...it just made me happier
but i dont know how to explaine this...
i mean thr is so much of a difference between us...he is the top of the world n i am well in one of the worst situation 'the bottom of the earth'....
is just so much fun hanging out wiv him...
but sighs...
i dont get it...
is just too hard for me to understand ...
i am just a normal girl n normal ppl dont mix wiv the best
__________________________
Girl our love is dyin
Why can't you stop tryin
I never been a quitah
But I do deserve betta
Believe me I will do bad
Let's forget the past
And let's start this new plan
Why? Cuz it's the same old routine
And then next week I hear them scream
Girl I know you're tired of the things they say
You're damn right
Cuz I heard them lame dame excuses just yesterday
That was a different thing
No it ain't
That was a different thing
No it ain't
That was a different thing
It was the same damn thing
Same ass excuses
Boy you're usless
Whhoooaaaa

memories just brings bak the tears of joy

whn i done the facebook quiz about what type of friend r u
i remember how we all fight n argue last time..
its just so stupid we r all jerks we fight for little things just for some little thing
we didnt want to stop the fight we dont want to surrender n we actually risk our friendship ...
but at last we all said sorry ... i felt so stupid why did we argue ..
i just felt a load rushing tears on my eyes when i think about it...
its just so stupid...
but yeah fighting n arguing made our friendship more longer lasting...we sure did have loads of fun n trashy habbits even sluttier words n now without all those arguments n fighting noise i just felt like a stranger in the crowd...
i feel so weird n WTF y am i here in this place y ...who is these peeps?? y r they acting like this y do they all have to wear a mask on their face when they r talking to some other ppl...
i mean its obvious that even i am not feeling like myself i just feel like hey am i saying the same freagine thing again n again ?? y am i doing this to myself
this is drivin me nuts...
but 1 thing is that even if i am strong in the outside i notice that i can cry that easily for anything that hurts me...i just cant control the tears i want to hold it bakk but it just falls out that easy...n i dont like it...i dont want to be looked down like the old kido i use to be ...
i am changing for the better trying not to make history repeat itself trying to hold bak my feelings to a boy...but is it working i really dont know ...
i guess i dont even know what is love ...

ouchhh

5 am in the morning my leg starts to hurt a lot the muscles just cram until the extend i couldn't move...
it last for 5mins then its gone when u just think u could go bak to sleep the pain comes back again this time i couldn't help but to wake my mom up...
its so painful...worst than anything else
i remember all those funny things we said n i just smile n laugh for no reason [kindda crazy rite]
i ask myself so many things ...
like y didnt i join the choir i mean i like singing
y didnt i join the hip hop exam ??i can dance way better than them
y didnt i join the piano exam
so many things than i always wanted to do but just because of no self confidence i drop out
why didnt i start eating less when i am 10 y didnt i ???
so many questions just seems to be twisting n turning in my head
is driving me crazy y didnt we plan more parties when HL n JY is still here
y ?yyyyyyyy can someone give me a perfect answer ??no rite??yea sighs
sighs
it all just go back to zero aint it??

_________________________
will u love me if i said i love u ??
will u believe me even if i am not true
can u make me change from bad to good
can u make my life more wonderful than now
i just want a smile
i just want to look at ur eyes all day n night until i can find out y
y did i fall for u
how did u make me do that ......... ..........

happy day :] although its raining

yesterday i dream of u in my sleep....
maybe wishing to a star that i can dance wiv u works....
although i will never get to dance wiv u but at least in my dream i get to dance wiv u rite ^0^
weird thing is that who is micheal!!!!i just heard the name n i saw ur face n a bicycle with 2seat ....
ur so gorgeous as always....
wow is so great ....nice dream but it was interupted when my moms phone rang n it woke me up T.T
then we went shopping at KLCC awesome its been so long since i have ever been to KLCC
the art galery thingy...so nice and so many nice things that i have never get to stop n slowly take a look...
finally when u really got time u will notice that there r so many beautiful things that u have rejected to take a look at it....
i bought mashmellows n we went to chilis to eat nice nacos brownies n my aunty swollowed a piece of paper when shes eating her sandwich which it wasn't surppose to be in the sandwich so we were laughing all along...
it was so nice to finally sit down n talk to everyone n i enjoyed it a lot...^0^
the supermarket it so hugh n it has japanese things i love it!!!!!!
hope u will know how much i miss ur voice